One of the common reasons why most people tell me that they are not able to save is pressures from relatives (wantoks). My advice is usually that: 1. They must educate to their relatives about the realities of working and living in modern urban centres. This is important because most relatives who live in rural areas think that people working in the towns and cities have a lot of money all the time. – Tiri Kuimbakul
HOW TO DEAL WITH PRESSURES FROM RELATIVES AND WANTOKS.
By Tiri Kuimbakul - 06 April 2023.
After speaking to working people in groups in my Financial Literacy Courses, I have one-on-one sessions during which individual participants meet with me for 20-30 minutes to discuss their personal financial issues.
One of the common reasons why most people tell me that they are not able to save is pressures from relatives (wantoks).
My advice is usually that:
1. They must educate to their relatives about the realities of working and living in modern urban centres. This is important because most relatives who live in rural areas think that people working in the towns and cities have a lot of money all the time.
2. They must know that they are in control, so they must take control of themselves and not be swayed by emotions. Sometimes the sad tales relatives tell to request assistance are made up (I know because I have been conned many times!). They control the money tap so they decide whether to give, and how much.
3. They must distinguish between people who deserve their help and those that don't. This is vital because many people who never supported the working person in any way usually come seeking help just because they are relatives. They never sowed, but now they want to reap. Such people are opportunists who deserve an immediate NO.
4. Where they MUST give, they need to explain why they cannot give exactly what is being requested. They must give less, and they must not borrow to give.
5. For those that have supported in a big way, the best way to thank them is to give them seed-money and empower them to use the money to establish their own income-generating activities. In that way the relatives will not keep on coming back and applying pressure for more help. Not providing seed money will make relatives dependent; giving them continually will develop the handout mentality in them.
I hope this helps someone out there.
Picture and words from Triri Kuimbakul, The Author and Inspirational Public Speaker.
